She was young, not particularly attractive, but had the expression of one who thinks she is. She was tall, graceful looking, well dressed. Very high heels. Very long straight hair. At her table in the restaurant, during a busy lunch hour, her laptop was opened in front of her. She was wearing ear buds. No food. Just the laptop. Maybe a coffee.

I noticed her because she was in my line of vision, but more so because she took out a hairbrush and began vigorously brushing her hair. I mean, with abandon. Flailing arms, hair being pulled out and brushed hard, flying everywhere. I could almost see the microscopic detritus from her scalp careening through the room and landing on people’s roasted turkey harvest wheatberry salads and frontega chicken paninis.

Once done, she removed the spiked heels and put on even higher ones.

Then there was make up. Foundation, powder, blush, eyes. All of it. Oh, lipstick too. Of course.

It was amazing. And really, really, really gross. WTF is wrong with people?